THE PARKINSONS

The addition of this review means this page takes on an even more international slant. You see the Parkinsons (bar the drummer) hail from Portugal. They sound, however, like the most sloppy of London punk bands of the '77 vintage. It is certainly an interesting cocktail although this album is probably most interesting as an anachronism. The band have a reputation for scintillating live performances so I went along to see them in Leeds in March on the tour they did with the Eighties B-Line Matchbox Disaster (see above) and Ikara Colt. The line-up was probably worth the media salivating that supported it and all three bands were refreshingly different from each other. The Parkinsons were probably the worst band of the trio and their set was utterly shambolic but there is no doubt that they are an interesting band. One does wonder, however, how fashionable they'd be if they were simply London oiks rather than Portuguese spivs. Anyway, at this stage they don't actually have enough songs to release an album, only a set's worth, so this is actually a mini-album; eight songs and 22 minutes long. It could be classed as an EP but I don't want to take too positive a step. The CD actually runs for 32 minutes with ten minutes of silence between the "last" song and the "hidden" track. In actual fact the "hidden" track simply isn't listed, it's not hidden, as such, at all. I think it is intended as a form of encore as the penultimate song, "Scientists", is stretched out into a shambolic noise-fest, exactly as they do on stage. The encore, then, is "Bad Girl". Not the New York Dolls' (excellent) song but a pretty decent original, nonetheless, with Alfonso, the singer, chanting "she's a bad girl" over a repetitive drum beat. Pretty stupid, but still fun. The "talent" in the band is guitarist Victor Torpedo who writes all the songs. Most riffs are pinched from the Sex Pistols, who in turn ripped them off Johnny Thunders so you know what you're getting all the way through. The vocals aren't that distinctive although you've got to applaud a Portuguese native for affecting such an authentic cockney accent. The production is effectively non-existent so this album stands, pretty much, as an exact replica of their stage show. Without the nudity. Although the CD print is still pretty vulgar. Picking out best tracks from the disc is not the most clear cut of procedures although I guess the first two and the last two just about stand out as the best. The opening "Primitive" starts off the album as you'd hope and expect, with a cry for the chorus of "Oh baby, it's a long way to nowhere" in Alfonso's mockney vocals. "Too Many Shut Ups" probably features the best riff on the album. On the other hand, "Angel in the Dark" maybe boasts the most original riff, being a more darker effort, but, as a result, it lacks some of the spirit of the more raucous numbers. Even so, if you are looking for wildly original music you've come to the wrong place. If you are looking for trouble you might have found the right place, although you'd be better trying their live performances. If you're looking for a fun, short old school punk album by a group of Portuguese misfits then, chances are, you have come to the right place after all.

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Email me at: jackfeeny@yahoo.co.uk